Every time I line up to race, I want to find my limits. I want to expand my capabilities. I want to have new experiences and learn how I can step up to the plate to respond. I’m on an infinite pursuit to be the best that I can be. And the best way for me to re-define my own limits is to race people who push me beyond them. That’s one reason why I travel to Europe to race XCM World Cups. While there are plenty of races in the USA, and plenty of amazing competitors to race against there, I find that expanding my horizons, racing against new and different people, on new and different terrain, ultimately makes me a better and more well-rounded racer.

As I pre-rode the race in Costa Blanca, Spain I was reminded that re-defining limits and experiencing new things is indeed, exactly what I was setting out to do. The course was brutal, 82 km with nearly 9,000 feet of climbing with extremely technical terrain that featured loose rocks the size of marbles, softballs, and bowling balls all scattered on top of embedded rock to challenge even the most technically savvy rider.

If you saw us start, though, you would never think such a hard course was ahead. We started hard, pushing up the 10-minute climb and breaking apart the group less than 5 minutes into the race.

After the initial climb and descent, I was just 10 seconds off of the lead group and I took a sigh of relief. “Ok. This is perfect. I did it.” Then I was on the ground. In the blink of an eye my front wheel washed out, not on a technical part of the course, but on a corner on a loose fire road. I hit the deck hard. The wind was knocked out of me. I got up before I could think, but a few moments later my knee was bleeding down my shin, my ankle was throbbing, and I was fallen back to the chase group. Well…that changes things.

After assessing the damage, I went back on the hunt, I left the chase group behind and I started to chip away on the lead group. By mile 15 I was back in the conversation. I was only 10-20 seconds behind the lead group. I dangled there for quite a while. The gap opened as I paid the price for my bridge back up and I pounded the fluids and nutrition. I knew the legs would come back, I just needed it sooner rather than later.

At mile 25, my rhythm was back, I was on the hunt, I was craning my neck around every corner to see who was ahead and then…I was on the ground again! I couldn’t believe it. Another fire road, just a loose corner, on the other knee and shoulder. I couldn’t believe that I made the same mistake twice. But I did know something now the second time, I can come back from this.

In the aftermath of the crash, I fell back to fighting for 7^th. It would have been ease to give in. I certainly had plenty of excuses to, but that wouldn’t be in the spirit of my ultimate goal: to find my true limit. I soldiered on.

With 8 miles to go, I was now fighting for 5^th. I was reaching the end of my rope, I just wanted the other woman to give in, but she wouldn’t. Then it hit me, I don’t want her to give up, I want her strength to help me find more of my own. Eventually, I looked back and she was gone.

I finished the race in 5^th. I’m really happy with the result, but I’m even happier with the way I overcome, the way I stayed committed to the effort, the way I used every obstacle as a chance to become better. This is what racing is all about and I can’t wait for the next chance to line up. This season is only getting started.